1. Jokes help!
When parents make jokes and play with the baby, they give him the tools for creative thinking to find new friends and to cope with stress. So do not hesitate to portray the court jester, your children in the future will thank you for it.
2. Be positive mood
There is nothing surprising: the parents, which in relation to children exhibit negative emotions and treat them roughly, one day discover that their child is very aggressive. This is bad news, because behavioral aggression at age 5 is directly linked with aggression in adulthood, even in relation to romantic partners. So if you are in a cycle parent evil - evil child - parent even angrier, as quickly as possible to tear the vicious link, it will greatly facilitate life for you and your child's adult life.
3. Encourage an objective self-esteem
Studies show that "samosostradanie" is a very important life skill that helps people stay in the face of challenges. This sense includes attentiveness, ability to manage thoughts and emotions without succumbing to them, but do not suppress them, it is humanity, compassion for the suffering of others, as well as recognition of their own problems and to solve them. Parents themselves must possess such qualities to cope with the difficulties in raising children, and to be an example to the child.
4. Release of children
When children want to fly away from the family nest, studies show that it is better to let them go. First-year students whose parents hardly let them go, more restless and less open to new experiences, compared with those whose parents easily released. This does not mean that the child reaches the age of 18 you must get rid of him, but that does not mean that you will assign your child's teacher meeting to challenge its assessment.
5. Constantly "feed" your marriage
Do not let your relationship get away derailed after birth. According to a study conducted in May 2011, the parents who suffer from instability in the relationship, thus causing sleep problems in their children. The study found that marital problems contribute to the development of mental abilities of young children. If the problem began when the child was not yet 9 months, to achieve them 18 months, the baby will develop serious problems with sleep. Probably problematic families - it is always a state of stress, which interferes with normal sleep.
If you suspect that you are starting to get depressed, you should seek help, thus you will help not only themselves, but also not harm the child. Studies show that depressed mothers can not cope with the upbringing of their children, and their cries of mothers annoying much stronger. Depressed mothers are also promoting a negative parenting style, thus they introduce their children to the state of stress, so according to the study children, grown in this parent becomes too sensitive and vulnerable. The results seem bleak, but experts say they are hopeful, as well raise a child can be, even when Mom and Dad are trying to improve their mental health.
7. Mom, be affectionate with your sons
According to the study in 2010, a close relationship with his mother keeps boys from anti-social behavior. Warm, friendly relations with her mother play a critical role in the behavior of children, especially boys. The findings, published in the journal "Child Development» (Child Development), underline the need for attachment between parents and children, that is the style of the relationship must be such that the child knows that he can come to mom and dad for "reliable basis" before than to get into the adult world.
Another study showed that a close relationship with his mother contributes to a better development of romantic relationships later in life. "The relationship between parents and children is very important because it is looking at them, the child builds its relations, parents are a model," - says a leading specialist research Geger Constance (Constance Gager). "Therefore, if a child does not feel the heat between the parents and in relation to itself, it will probably be the same way and build their relations in the future."
8. Do not put pressure on the child
Teens often do not want to communicate with parents, this may be due to the repulsion of peer pressure out. In other words, the autonomy of the house promotes autonomy among friends.
But do not worry: the experts do not believe that children should be adversarial relationship with their parents. In fact, a strong link between the adolescent and the parent is also associated with less peer pressure. Teens should be able to stand up for themselves, but they also need the support of parents.
9. Do not strive for perfection
No one is perfect, so do not torture yourself by asking too high a bar to achieve concrete progress in education. According to the survey of 2011 parents who believe that society expects from them perfect success in nurturing children feel more tense, and they lose confidence in their parenting skills. And no wonder! Try to ignore the pressure from the outside, and you will surely implement quietly as a parent.
10. Understand your children
Everyone thinks they know the best methods to educate a child. But it turns out that education - this thing is far from universal. In fact, those children whose parents have adapted their parenting style for the child, much less likely to experience feelings of anxiety and are in the doldrums compared with those raised by parents aggressive and tough. It turns out that some children, especially those who are experiencing difficulties with emotion regulation, need more help from mom and dad. However, parents do not always feel it, so a child in such situations does not receive what he needs. It is important to pick up signals from the child and to assist him in the development.